Back in 2014 and 2015 when I was dealing with treatment for breast cancer and the after effects I read “Be Here Now” by Ram Dass and it struck a chord with me. The last thing I wanted was to be where I was then. Tired, in pain and full of fear. I only wanted to fantasize about how my life was going to look when I kicked that cancer to the curb. I wanted to think about all of the things I was going to do.

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But the teacher in the book said, “Don’t think about the past, be here now.” “Don’t think about later, be here now.” And so I sat with my fear, grief, anger and all of the other emotions I felt. And I realized that that’s all they were. Emotions. Based on fear. Fear of the unknown. What was there to grieve for? I was going to live – minus a small chuck that was taken out of my left breast. I got off easy. I didn’t even have to deal with hair loss.

Be here now, fear of the unknown stopped having quite so much power over me (I am still working on this one) when I realized I’m always dealing with the unknown. I don’t know that I won’t get into a car crash on my way to work today. It’s unknown whether I’ll be alive this time next year writing these essays. The unknown is always present.

Be here now.

What will the next season, holiday or crop bring?

Be here now.

Will it be a hot summer? Will all of my kids be here for Thanksgiving or Christmas? When will I get to see my boy who lives in Florida again?

Be here now.

It is spring. I saw a hawk from the kitchen window this morning flying with a stick in its mouth. I’m sure he or she is building a nest near by. It was something neat to see.

Be here now.

I patched a hole I made in a wall. I caused myself extra work when I ripped that ugly panel of faux tile off the wall. It was a set-back in my kitchen update. So what.

Be here now.

Savor the tea, relish in the feel of morning sunshine on your skin, enjoy the wet kisses your puppy loves to give.

Be here now.